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9 Nov

Update 1: My hair.  I love the blowout!  It’s been a couple of weeks now and it’s still mostly straight.  I got a haircut on Saturday and it’s the shortest it’s been in a while.  A coworker complimented me this morning!  Yay for a feel good moment.The color is awful and I still want to try blowing it dry one more.  I think that will make a huge difference too.

Update 2: Nursing.  We’re still going strong.  I’ve stopped pumping altogether!  I *think* I have enough frozen milk to get MC through until his first birthday in 19 days <sob>  I’m still deciding if we need to introduce another kind of milk until he’s eating more solid food.  I’m not down with cow milk and babies.  MM was a fan of rice milk.  Maybe coconut milk?  I’ve been reading some good stuff about that.  My nips are still a mess from MC’s teeth.  We had a better stretch but then his ear got infected AGAIN and we’re back to ouches. 

This is MC’s third ear infection or maybe it’s been one long infection that he’s having trouble kicking.  I’m so sad for him and hate that he’s on his third round of antibiotics.  I’m stripping diapers again which is a pain in the butt.  And looking into a chiropracter.  I want my baby healthy!

So yes…19 days.  We’re having a party at the house and having Rudy’s do the cooking.  My parents and my inlaws are coming in for Thanksgiving and for the birthday festivities.  My friend Jodi at Inkin’ in Pink designed the invitations, cupcake wrappers/toppers and a sweet banner for the party. I’ll post pictures after.

MM’s party is on January 22 – this will be her first “friend” party. I’m so stoked. I’m still working on the details but it will be at the gymnastics studio we play at on Fridays. Can’t wait.

I can’t believe my babies are going to be one and three.

MC stood on his own for the first time yesterday. I cried. The two of them are so crazy cute together. My favorite it first thing in the morning when MC & I wake up. He’s so sweet and smiley and flip flops around on the bed talking his baby talk. MM will come in once she wakes up and his little face lights up. She’ll start calling out “my brother, my brother!” when she sees him and they wrestle together for a little bit. It seriously melts my heart. If you would have asked me 4 years ago if I thought I’d even have moments like this I never would have believe it to be possible.

Happy Halloween!

2 Nov

Having an almost three year old on Halloween is just about the most awesome thing ever.  MM was *so* excited.  She was a rock star, hitting  just about every house on the cul de sac without complaining.  She’s still a little young to realize that chocolate is way tastier than a pink lollypop but that’s fine by be.  Mama can take care of the chocolates thankyouverymuch.

The kids were all adorable.  Our ‘hood did the same kind of block party as last year.  Sweet H and his parents came over as well – the kiddos were Pebbles, BamBam & a baby dinosaur and were absolutely scrumption. 

In other news, MC is still killing me with his crappy latch.  I got a script for APNO and it seems to be doing wonders but I hate, hate, hate cringing every time that poor baby wants some milk.  I’ve just about quit pumping altogether which is glorious but I think I’m going to come up short with my frozen stash before he hits 12 months.  Need to address that issue with myself and probably start back up again for another week or so.  I also need to make a follow up appt with the ped to take another look at the poor guy’s ears. 

I almost forgot how cute 11 months is.  The baby “uh oh!” is precious and I love it.  He’s also added “dog” to his list ‘o words.  Still no mama though.  Grrrrr.

More drivel.

26 Oct

The anxiety is coming and going and I can’t figure it out.  What I can tell you is that my house is a disaster – even my messiness threshhold has been exceeded.  If you’ve seen my house you know that’s really, really bad.

In other news (well, not really news) I’m doing some stuff for me.  Laser hair removal on my chin, hair straightening (more on this later) and I’m contemplating joining the Board for T.F.M. (more on that next week).

Hair straightening: one of my AP friends used to do hair before she had her daughter.  She’s now back to salon work on a limited basis and she was running a promo for braz.illian blowouts.  I had it done last night and so far I really like it!  I haven’t washed it yet – that’ll be the true test – so I don’t know if it’s as low maintenece as they say but I really hope so.  I feel better about myself when I look like a professional adult and not like a disheveled, unkempt, ponytail wearing slacker. 

It was a long process so we had plenty of time to talk – we’re going to try to get the kids together for a zoo trip soon.  She has another friend that has similar parenting views – I’m hoping that this might be my new friend network once B. moves away.

I haven’t pumped all day today and I didn’t go see MC at lunch.  I have a day trip to Houston tomorrow and I’m hoping to avoid pumping if possible.  MC took a big bite out of my left nip and it STILL hurts.  I foolishly/lazily let him nurse with a bad latch during one of his many wakeups last night and I think it made the wound worse.  Ugh.  I need the sleeping/night nursing thing to get better and I’m afraid the only way to make that happen is to put an end to cosleeping.  I’m so conflicted over this whole thing.  I love sleeping with him.  I love nursing him.  I do not love the constant exhaustion.  He has an ear infection right now.  We’re supposed to go back to the ped in a week or so for a follow up – if he has a clean bill of health at that point I think I’m going to try the crib with me in bed next to it to see how it goes. 

Why did I ever think he was an easy baby? 😛

On breastfeeding

12 Aug

I love nursing.  It was a rough start for me and MM.  She had a crummy latch and the hospital lactation consultant wasn’t very helpful.  But I was determined – we WERE going to make this work. 

We stayed at the hospital for 48 hours or whatever until we were discharged.  Within two days of getting home my nipples were a bruised, bleeding mess and I was dreading every single time she wanted to nurse.  My milk still wasn’t in. 

Our pediatrician has an in-house lactation consultant.  My husband made us an appointment as I sobbed my heart out.  She saw us (all three of us) first thing the next morning.  She told me was to ditch the boppy.  It wasn’t a good fit for me.  She got me hooked up with My Brest Friend (cheesy name but a total lifesaver!) and it made a world of a difference. 

My milk was starting to come in that morning though I wasn’t feeling the painful engorgement that I had heard about.  The LC recommended a nipple shield to give my poor nips a chance to heal – I knew of the perils of nipple shields but given the amount of pain I was in and my determination to be successful I gave it a try. 

And of course, MM became a nipple shield addict. 

For three freaking months I attempted to wean her from those things.  Fortunately, she never had weight gain issues so it was just inconvenient as opposed to troublesome.  Every time I tried to ditch them she’d wail her heart out.  Until one day she didn’t and that was it.  That’s pretty much been a constant in her life. 

We continued our nursing relationship until she was 18 months old and I was 20 weeks pregnant.  I hadn’t decided one way or the other about tandem nursing.  After a lot of angst I decided to not decide and just let her lead the way.  We were out of town visiting my parents and I nursed her to sleep praying that she would make it through the trip so I could nurse her down for a nap on the plane home (she did).  She nursed one more time at home in our rocker and that was it.  She never asked for it again.

MC was born at a local freestanding birth center.  Dude latched on right away without any trouble.  We just made it to the other side of a nursing semi-strike where he wouldn’t nurse anywhere unless we were side lying, it was dark and it was quiet.  Well, with a 2.5 year old girl in the house those opportunities were few and far between.  I was honestly afraid that he would quit altogether but he’s doing just fine now.

When MC was roughly 4 days old MM told me she wanted some “baby milk”.  I was flabbergasted and honestly taken aback.  I said sure and offered her a breast.  She got pretty close (I’m sure I was cringing) and then pulled back and made a toddler version of a joke about it being baby milk.  I’m not going to lie – I was relieved.  

All of that was to show that I’m a huge supporter of breastfeeding.  I think every woman owes it to her baby to educate herself and give it her best effort.  There are those women out there that can’t.  They’ve tried their hardest and for whatever reason it just isn’t working.  Maybe they need to get back on their heart medication and that’s not compatible with nursing.  Maybe they’re teachers and they have to return to work and they don’t have anyone to cover their classroom while they pump.  Who knows?  Until you’ve walked a step in their shoes you don’t know their situation.  EVERY MOTHER (well, MOST mothers anyway) wants to do the best they can for their babies.  That’s what moms do. 

Formula was invented for those mothers that can’t make nursing work.  There shouldn’t be guilt involved but of course there is.  I’ve tried to make the best decisions for my family and knowing that I’m doing everything I can I still feel guilty about 100 different things.  We’re human, we’re not perfect and yet we expect to be.   

I’m working hard to stop being so judgemental about the decisions other mothers have made.  I’ll admit to judginess surrounding c-sections, formula feeding and other parenting choices.  It’s not fair – I don’t know everyone’s stories.  I’ve been judged for the choices I’ve made – returning to work and putting my kids into part-time daycare especially.  It stings, especially since I’m not always confident in the decision I made.  And there aren’t campaigns, billboards and flashmobs (wish I was there instead of on an airplane with two kids and no husband) touting the advantages of staying at home with the kids. 

I still think it’s important to normalize nursing and educate the masses on why breast is best but I’m committed to doing so in a compassionate, thoughtful  manner.