This is really rubbing me the wrong way.

2 Feb

This article was posted on Facebook yesterday by Natural Parenting: Can Working Parents be AP?

The article itself is fine. Nothing earth shattering but perfectly fine.  The comments on Facebook blew my mind.  I can’t believe there are people out there that actually believe that working parents mothers can’t practice attachment parenting (please note that dads seem to get a free pass – it’s okay if they work.  Not mothers though – they’re crucified for making that choice.)

I’ve been a working mom since MM turned 4 months old and I returned to work.  Sadly, my boss at the time was not open to a nontraditional work schedule so full time it was.  There was a small school across the parking lot from my office so we opted to use them for MM.  I was able to visit with her on my lunch break to nurse and play with her – it was as good as it gets.  I would have rather have been home with her but that wasn’t in the cards at the time.  My husband works in the mortgage industry – the market crashed right after she was born.  Thinking about relying solely on his income made me nervous so we did what we had to do.  I’m secure with my decision and I don’t think anyone could point a finger and say that MM does not have a secure attachement to her family.  She made sure of it by never, ever sleeping for the first year of her life 🙂

I hate the mommy wars.  The judgement.  The name calling.  If it take a village then why do so many women try so hard to burn the village down? 

I took  MC to the eye doctor yesterday.  We waited for an hour and a half during which I was reprimanded by another mother for letting him climb up onto a child sized chair and pull a bead maze thingy closer to him so the edge was hanging off of the table.  The mother told me that the maze was going to fall on him.  *I* wasn’t worried about it and didn’t really see the big deal – it’s not like it weighed a ton or was really big – it just would have made some noise.  She was clearly judging me for my neglectful ways.  I didn’t really care. 

I’m far from perfect and certainly do my own fair share of judging other mothers but I like to think I know enough to keep those thoughts in my own head.  It’s probably good that I’m an older mother – I know my discretion in my younger years wasn’t nearly as fine tuned.  But then again, Facebook didn’t exist so my opportunity to make the world at large feel like crap would have been limited.


One Response to “This is really rubbing me the wrong way.”


  1. Tweets that mention This is really rubbing me the wrong way. « Absolutely Adequate -- - February 2, 2011

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Absolutely Adequate, Absolutely Adequate. Absolutely Adequate said: New blog post: If it takes a village to raise a child why are so many moms arsonists? #attachmentparenting […]

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